


the ashes of a life

by politicalmamaduck



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, Birthday, Gen, Kylo Ren Backstory, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-06
Updated: 2016-09-06
Packaged: 2018-08-13 11:29:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7975255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/politicalmamaduck/pseuds/politicalmamaduck
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kylo Ren does not celebrate his birthday.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the ashes of a life

**Author's Note:**

  * For [solikerez](https://archiveofourown.org/users/solikerez/gifts).



The boy named Ben cried alone in his room.

The man named Kylo ignited his lightsaber and slashed through a set of training droids.

 

The boy named Ben poured his heart and soul into the poetry he wrote, translating it from Basic to Alderaani to Corellian and back. 

The man named Kylo burned all of his poetry on flimsiplast and cut the datapads on which he wrote in half.

The flimsiplast burned and charred, twisting into unrecognizable shapes in the firelight. 

Nearly thirty years before, a man named Luke Skywalker had watched a similar scene play out on the forests of Endor’s moon: a life being taken by the flames and warped beyond all recognition.

But Kylo Ren did not care to know the details of his grandfather’s death, and gave the life of Ben Solo over to the flames much the way Darth Vader had sacrificed Anakin Skywalker. 

 

The boy named Ben tossed and turned in his bed at night, unable to sleep for the nightmares that unyieldingly plagued him.

The man named Kylo didn’t even bother attempting to sleep. 

 

The boy named Ben adored his parents, who were full of life and energy.

The man named Kylo cursed his parents, rueing the day they met, and killed his father.

 

What is another year, in a life marked by misery and turmoil?

The demarcation of Kylo Ren’s life was as clear as the scar bisecting his face, a gift from a wretched scavenger and a traitor. 

 

When he was a child, his whole family, Uncle Chewie, Uncle Lando, and Uncle Luke included, came to his parents’ home to celebrate his birthday.

He would not allow himself to remember that now, to remember the people who had loved him, nor the taste of Alderaanian sweetbread on his tongue. 

 

Kylo Ren had awoken the morning of his birthday, not allowing himself the solace of memory, and went about it like any other. 

No one here knew, or cared, that the boy known as Ben Solo had been born on this day many years ago. 

His morning oatmeal tasted like ash on his tongue. 

He wouldn’t have had it any other way. 

Another year meant nothing to him, except that it put more distance between Kylo Ren and Ben Solo’s ignominious past.

**Author's Note:**

> This piece was written in honor of the lovely Rezi's birthday! It was meant to go along with an edit, which you can view on Tumblr here: http://huxsmurderbeam.tumblr.com/post/150044374104/in-celebration-of-the-amazing-solikerezs
> 
> Huge thanks to Katie for her amazing work on the edit and betaing this piece for me!  
> You can find me on tumblr at politicalmamaduck.tumblr.com.


End file.
